February | a note on affection
This month’s theme is all around the idea of affection. I think there are so many ways to show love and probably more importantly, so many ways to receive love. In the spirit of February being a season of love with Valentine’s Day on the horizon, admittedly my least favorite holiday of the year, I do want to write about love from a different perspective. I want to share ways I love …ways I love my home, ways I love my loved ones, ways I love strangers, ways to love on a small business, and ways to receive love by gratitude.
GIVING AND RECEIVING AFFECTION TO AND FROM THE HOME:
This might be a far stretch to ask, but I promise it changes your perspective. Start viewing your home as a living and breathing thing. When you wipe those counters for the 100th time today, smile knowing these counters have been the prep space for school lunches. When you notice the dent in the door frame, I hope it reminds you of that Christmas morning when your little one tested out his new tricycle.
Appreciating your home from the perspective of all that it has given you, it’ll change the way you love on your home. It’ll change the way you see those mundane moments and chores.
LOVING ON YOUR LOVED ONES:
-Ask your loved ones what their favorite song is so when you hear it, you think about them. This is a subjective way to receive love, to empathetically listen to a song from the perspective of that person. You can savor that moment to yourself or shoot that person a text to let them know you’re thinking about them.
-Mark special dates in your calendar for your loved ones. …not just birthdays! But the hard dates too. For some, holidays are hard without the presence of loved ones. For others, it might be the anniversary of sobriety. Loving on your people in between the more obvious celebrations is a form of affection that goes much deeper than the surface level.
-Easter eggs! I love leaving easter eggs of notes and happies when I visit a friend or a family member. I do this for my kids a lot. Write on the bathroom mirror with lipstick. Leave an “I love you” sticky note in the car. Take a sharpie to the milk jug in the fridge (my kids love this one).
LOVING ON STRANGERS:
-Constantly ....and I mean constantly even if that means it’s ten times a day… remind yourself that the person you’re yelling at on the road through your windows, the barista who got your coffee wrong, the customer service representative on the phone has something to cry about. Everyone has something that will send the tears flowing. Everyone’s got a story looping through their hearts or a struggle going on internally that no one knows about. Remembering that could change the course of someone else’s day.
-Seems like an easy one, but just smile. Smile at all the strangers. …even if they don’t smile back. Talk to the clerk scanning your groceries. Just make conversation. You never know how much that might positively affect someone’s day (read note above again).
-Leave notes in weird places. I’m clearly a fan of this one. Write a sweet message on the receipt at a restaurant. Leave sticky notes of kind messages in random places (on someone’s window shield, in your mailbox for your postal worker to see, etc.). I mean think about it. How would you feel if you had a note that said “you’re amazing and doing a great job” left on your car’s wind shield wipers? Pretty good.
-Pay it forward in unexpected ways. Go to the library and pay for someone’s late fee. Call a local public school and pay off someone’s school supply fee or over-due lunch money.
LOVING ON SMALL BUSINESSES:
-Showing some love for a small business doesn’t always require a purchase. Leave a great review on Google. Many customers hire or visit small and local businesses based on these reviews! If you enjoyed something about a shop, restaurant, or business you recently visited, leave a review. …even if it’s something small.
-Social media love is a great and low-bar way to love a small business. Saving, commenting, and liking a post means that the silly algorithm is paying attention …meaning more eyes will see the business. Trust me, every small business is just trying to keep up with the latest algorithm change.
-If you can support a local or small business with your purchases over a big box store, do it! I promise you these businesses are counting every sale and doing the math to see how close they are at reaching their “break-even” number for the month. Only then can they breathe a little easier. Support these shops first!
. . .
So, whether it’s during the month that celebrates love or on any (or all) of the other 364 days of the year, I hope these little ideas might spark ways for you to show affection. Don’t get me wrong, we’re all human. I’ve had my fair share of road rage. But in the quiet, slower moments of life that I’m able to pause long enough to show some love …it’s made a difference. It makes a difference in hopefully the other person’s day first, but for sure my own heart.